Thanks to everyone who participated for another wonderful Not Church gathering.
Choir-oke gets better every month…it’s amazing what can be accomplished with a little practice and some margaritas.
Gratitude for the present moment and letting go help unlock the doors to liberation as we were reminded in Martina’s story..
Liberation is not a destination
by Bodhi Martina
For many reasons, I left the church at 14. I loved Jesus, but this God they talked about who was vindictive and judgmental and liked to smite people….was pretty frightening. The straw that broke the camel’s back came when I was told that it was God’s will that my mother, suffered a 10 year battle with cancer and died at 43, leaving 3 children. I wondered, “What kind of God was that?!”
But it was this – that began my spiritual search. 20 years later and books, therapy and teachers. I was still searching this illusive understanding of the truth. I wanted to be happy. Why couldn’t I make that happen? I love to write, so I wrote a book, Call From the Heart, that told of my spiritual travels. I took the manuscript to the Shaman whom I had been following. She gave me a ceremony to do in order to birth the book. I had chosen not to bring children into this world, until I was sure I could make them happy. This wise woman said the book was my baby. Following her instructions, I journeyed to southern Baja and camped on the beach at the edge of the exquisite Gulf of California – a cathedral of nature – was for me the true church. I climbed a little mountain to its top.
When I was finished, I did not feel relieved. I felt frustrated and angry. I still did not understand, what I was after? Why couldn’t I rest? I was still in a state of deep yearning for something I could not name. I looked into the vast blue Baja Sky and crying out to the invisible guiding ones, I begged. “WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME? I HAVE TO KNOW NOW!” It sounded more like a wail, than a prayer.
Suddenly, it was like being thrust into that blue sky above…a clarity overcame this very small Martina. This “me” I thought myself to be disappeared into the vastness. There was nothing! Yet it was everything! IT was VASTNESS no words or names could touch. It was so sudden, I was filled with wonder and awe.
I began to laugh. The pure joy of laughing consumed me and I could not stop. I knew everything and it was nothing at all. I came down the mountain in a state of euphoria for days in the beauty of land, sea and sky. The great birds spoke to me of freedom. Yet, ever so slowly, […]